Friday, October 29, 2010

Christmas Decorating

Okay so I know what you are thinking... "It's way to early to decorate for Christmas." Well not in my house where I'm in-charge of the decorating. I like to put it up early so I can enjoy it longer. It makes me happy. I'm not much of a Halloween decorator, sure I like the holiday, I just feel like it's way over done. So most years once I get enough of all of the Halloween going on, I put up my Christmas tree.

Yesterday was mostly a cleaning day for me. The house was awful and I needed to get it back on track. I recruited the boys to help me, and they did a great job, so to reward all of us I got out the Christmas tree. We got out the tree, set it up, plugged it in, and nothing (good thing we didn't decorate it first). It was so sad. We have a per-lit tree and none of the lights were working (*cry*). I had gotten this tree from Target  only 2 years ago. My mom bought a Target tree the same year I did, and hers messed up much sooner, so I knew it was coming. We put our sad faces aside, and I got out the Santa's Workshop. It's a set that was given to us by Jeremy's parents, he use to help set it up as a kid. And it was broken (*cry* again). It wasn't to bad, nothing a little glue won't fix, but it was so sad. So with our decorating going nowhere, the kids and I set out to buy a new Christmas tree. We went to Wal-mart. Our last tree, the one before the Target one, was a pre-lit tree from wal-mart, and it lasted for 5 years (good track record). We found one for $68, and that's a get price for a 6ft tree. We also bought some ribbon, and garland. We got home and began to decorate. YAY!! I'm so happy that we didn't have anymore disappointments. So all is well, and my house looks great, and I am super happy. Word of advice... "Never buy a target tree." Thanks for reading!

Monday, October 18, 2010

Independence in the way...

So the holiday season is fast approaching, and I'm looking forward to it, for the most part. I am sorry to say that I am not looking forward to all of the family dinners. I'm just going to be honest in this post. I have been having some difficulty trying to fit back into my family ever since moving back. I know it has been over a year, and I should have figured it out by now, but I haven't. Most family gatherings I spend my time sitting and talking with Jeremy. Yeah I know I can do that any time. I just don't know how to relate to them anymore, and part of that is my fault, but part of it is not (I would just like to put that in).

Okay so the part that is my fault... I have changed, I don't depend on them for friendship like I use to. I have grown use to being my own friend, and being Jeremy's best friend, and him being mine. Yes that is how marriage is supposed to be, but on most days Jeremy is the only adult I talk to, and I have grown use to that. I am also not good at starting conversation, nor am I good at keeping them going, not with new people anyways, and that is how my family is to me now, they are new people. I have meet them before, but we have fallen away, and changed, and now they are new. So yes my indifference, and my lack of social skills in an awkward situation is what the problem is.

The part that isn't my fault... I have mentioned in the past that some of my family members were bitter towards me (for whatever reason), and that makes things really difficult. It has gotten a little better, but not much. It was mentioned to me some time ago that some curtain family members were upset with me, for reasons I can not control (I'm not going to go into it), and that just really hurt me. It wasn't fair, I was far away, and I missed my family, and I thought about them, and sent my prayers to them, and longed to see them again, and I find out that they are mad at me. I don't want this to sound like a wine-fest, but it just wasn't fair, and like I said before it really hurt. I have since just let it go, and not mentioned anything to them, but it makes me reluctant to talk to them. So my hurt, and their feeling towards is, are the problems.

The holiday season was very hard for me last year, because I had to juggle so much family time. We live close to both mine, and his families, and I have to play the fair game with visiting, and it's not easy. I also don't enjoy all of the driving. Back when we lived 3000 miles away, we didn't have to worry about that, we did the holidays how we wanted to, and it was great. Okay yes I know, I did say that I missed my family, and I did (and do), and so here I am. Yes I wanted to come back, yes I wanted my kids to see their grandparents more. Yes I wanted to reconnect with my Sisters, brother, family members, and all of my old friends. Yeah great fun! All I have to say for myself is nothing is ever easy (which is a quote from the character Zedd, in my favorite book series The Sword Of Truth). Zedd is so right!

I just hope that I will gain some understanding from other people, maybe by them reading this. I didn't want to put any of my family on the spot or make them feel bad. This post was more to explain myself and why I act the way that I do. I just want them to know that I love them, and I'm working on the relationship part. God has really laid it on my heart to work on this, and I am trying (maybe not hard enough, but trying). I also want to say that I do enjoy reconnecting, and it has worked-out with some of my old friends (so they don't feel like I dislike being with them), and I just want to thank them for being patient with me (Dawn and Becky you are awesome). Thanks for reading and putting up with this post.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Pumpkins are painted!

Yay! So starting from the top... Daddy's, Zachary's, Darien's, Mine, Nathaniel's, and Olivia's!

Yesterday was some-what of a crazy day. My plan was to go grocery shopping and catch up on some house work. Now I did get to do that just not in the way that I planed. I woke up late, and this is all do to the sun coming up later and later. It's hard to wake up on time, if the sun isn't getting up with you. I like to be up at 6am, but with the way the sun is raising these days, I haven't been waking up until 7am. I need day light saving to end, and it will soon (just a few more weeks), but not soon enough. I had forgotten to make a list the night before, so I had to make it after getting up, or should I say after feeding the kids. Jeremy also got up late, because I got up late (I'm his alarm clock), but he has the day off (for the most part). He had only a few work related things to do. We get to ft Meade Commissary (yup that's where I shop, best thing about being a military family), and they are still doing construction on part of the store (on the joys). Shopping doesn't take to long, and I didn't stray from the list (yay). We get home, and with great difficulty I carried everything inside (the boys and pets kept getting in my way). Zachary and Nathaniel did help me put it all away though (Darien is to cool to help apparently, that's okay he's the only one who didn't move up on the treasure chart)(haha). After that I feed Olivia, put her down for a nap, and started on laundry (I hate laundry). Zachary kept asking me "When are we going to paint our pumpkins mom?" I kept telling him "Later, we need Daddy to be home, so we can do it as a family." So of course the second Jeremy steps in the door... "Can we paint our pumpkins now?" At this time, we had just finished lunch, and I needed to get dinner ready. I was making home made soup. Meanwhile I'm still catching up on laundry, dishes, and whatever else. I told Zachary to wait until after dinner. Made the soup and only Zachary and I liked it. Last time I made it the only one who gave me grief was Darien, and Jeremy loved it and was practically licking his bowl, but this time... All I have to say for myself is that I made it the same way, so I don't know why they didn't like it. I thought it was great. Yup after that we painted our pumpkins. Yay! Now lets hope today is a bit easier.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Fall is finally here!

Yay! I was getting a little tired of the hot summer weather, that we get here on the east coast. I was also waiting with excitement to wear my fall and winter clothes, and I am happy to say that for past 2 days I have been wearing things from my winter wardrobe. Today in this...

Yes it is cute. I have been waiting to wear it.

Last week on the way to Jeremy's parents house, we bought pumpkins, for us to paint, like we did last year. The pumpkins are half price over there (compared to how they are over here). Yeah Wow. I'll post pictures of the paining of the pumpkins once we do them, but here are the pictures from last year...

I'm excited about trick or treating! This year we are all going together, not that I mind just sitting at home and handing out candy, it's just not as fun. This year we are all going together, even little Olivia has a costume. Darien and Zachary are power rangers, Nathaniel is Bat Man, and Olivia is a ladybug. I was just going to wear my Pooh Bear ears, and go as Pooh again, and Jeremy was joking that he was going to be a Sailor.

Tonight we plan on going to Awana, at our new church, for the first time. I'm excited, and I'll tell you how it turns out. Not much else to say, thanks for reading, will write again soon!